The Benifits

1. Insurance companies approve you for anything, no matter what. I even have out-of-network providers. It seems that, for insurance companies, the magic word is "terminal". It turns all answers into "yes". 

2. You get every exception. 

3. Ladies at work feed you cookies. 

4. Ladies at work send you on extremely extravagant vacations. 

5. Everyone thinks your jokes are the funniest. 

6. You get to fall asleep in meetings and everyone "understands" (don't think for a second I don't take full advantage of this). 

7. You get to act erratic and blame it on your treatments. 

8. People give you room/leeway. 

9. People think your advice is worth more than it really is. 

10. You can buy (and smoke) marijuana legally. (By the way, some know, some don't: I am a medical marijuana patient. A sub-benefit to that is that you get the choicest shit there is. If it weren't for that I'd weigh much, much less). 

11. You have the power to ruin someone's day (this isn't always fun, but sometimes it is...). 

12. It illuminates what is important in life (which is very cliche, but true none-the-less). 

13. You realize how beautiful driving across the 520 bridge really is. 

And many, many more.